I was going to keep this post about friends and significant people in our lives, however I am going to extend it to all people I either are in contact with or may come into contact with.
When I was working and had my own place I amassed quite a number of ‘friends’, acquaintances, colleagues and other people who I would regularly mix and interact with. However the last few years, due to my on going illness has seen this network of people disappear, some just don’t want to know, others think my illness is fake, some I have opted to stay away from and some are just complete idiots. It has been said that a true measure of friendship can be measured when the excrement hits the air conditioning unit and you see who is there to support you.
An example of this was a vegan group I was a member of that had a big core membership and people were all “yea, this is great”, “wow, support the animals man”, “so important to have ethics and morals”, “blah blah blah blah blah blah”, etc. etc. etc. All the cliched things that non-vegans hate about us vegans and our alleged do goody ways. This is so far from the truth, most vegans I have had the displeasure to come into contact with are just egotistical, judgemental, up their own backsides and in it for the kudos. I have been a vegan for over 25 years and there are only a handful of vegans I have known that are decent, true to their word and are worthy of being called a good person. The vegan group I belonged to would all go out for a drink with you after an event and I would often get the first round in and then abracadabra, they would all disappear into the wind. They would turn up at fundraisers for animals and get as much as they can for their buck by stuffing themselves stupid, drinking themselves to the point of obliterated and just want as much as they can.
The group above eventually fell apart as everyone did not get on, had different views of veganism, the organiser wanted it all their own way with no exceptions and people generally disliked each other.
I used to treat a lot of my friends and people around me to nights out, holidays, a day away and to generally be a nice person and to do what i thought was a good thing. I now find myself ill, with very little money and is disarray with my mood swinging like a pendulum as I try to get to grips with things and sort out my wretched life. Where are all these friends now? Where is their help now when I need some help and assistance?
Well that I can tell you the answer to, they have disappeared as I am no longer useful to them, or they do not want to return the favour of listening to my problems like I used to make time for them, they see me as weak and vulnerable and therefore time for them to find some other sucker to befriend. In turn they have betrayed me and they were not really friends or good people, just parasitic barnacles hanging around for their own selfish reasons. People that I used to get drinks for and socialise with now do not want to meet up as I have told them I am homeless and have no money. Their true colours have been revealed and to me I am probably best off without them
I used to work for a large bank in the city and one of my projects was to spend a lot of time in Warsaw, Poland doing IT migration. Over the course of about 3 years I spent 12 months there and various members of my colleagues in London did short spells with me. In all it worked out to about 9 other staff, all were married and some had kids. All but one of these 9 people decided what happened in Poland stayed in Poland and off they went on a shagging frenzy with all the prostitutes they could in their spare time. Some of these people I used to call friends but now they are just douche bags. Once again I was betrayed as I was now expected to keep their dirty secrets from their partners if we ever met up. They have also betrayed their spouses and their children for the sake of a quick shag.
A friend told me yesterday that she heard it said you would be hard pushed to count the number of real friends on one hand as you get older. This does not surprise me as when you get older you do realise people are full of shit, just out to get things and status point, out to rinse you dry of your good nature, out for themselves and fuck those that are struggling. People have bought into this designer, corporate, materialistic, stuff and meaningless existence, no longer do people look out for the person in need or to sit and talk with you as a human being. People want gratification of one form or another for everything they do, sexual gratification, financial gratification, materialistic gratification and taste gratification, that’s all that matter in a world where people do not care and will betray anyone just to get the gratification they seek.